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1401
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 29
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 Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 1:15 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| Well I am getting engaged and my boyfriend said I can do whatever I want as far as the wedding/reception. He says he doesn't care as long he gets to marry me. (too cute IMO) So I am completely boggled as far as what to do....I have a small family and a few close friends (25 people max) but he has like 200 family members in this state alone. From what research I have done so far, I want a small ceremony and a big reception, but I do not know where to begin. Pretty much to sum it up, I am panicking, any ideas? |
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1Sluccaddicy
Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 53
Location: Guatemala
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 1:23 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| Have the ceremony with just immediate family and close friends and invite everyone to the reception. My cousin just did this and it worked perfectly. None of the other family was ticked that they werent invited to the ceremony either. |
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4532
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 24
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 1:31 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| Go on the knot.com and start laying out the ground work.Step by Step. |
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1Sluccaddicy
Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 53
Location: Guatemala
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 1:39 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| Start by finding the location(s). You will need a fairly large one for a reception of that size. Also you mentioned that you wanted a small ceremony, kind of impossible with a guest list that size, you will end up hurting someone's feelings if they are not invited to the actual ceremony. My suggeston is that if you live somewhere with nice weather plan and outdoor wedding, one where the wedding ceremony and reception can take place at one location. Logistically this is the easiest, and everyone will feel included in your special day. |
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1lyloaboodycle
Joined: 08 Dec 2007
Posts: 49
Location: Burma
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 1:47 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| Even though he said that, when it comes to his family, I would talk to him and his parents before setting anything in stone over a guest list. You are joining that family, and you don't want anyone feeling slighted by you--that's a tough thing to overcome. Do yourself a favor, and check out theknot.com. They have checklists, etc that are very helpful. |
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6204
Joined: 24 Nov 2007
Posts: 16
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 1:55 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| Figure out a budget first: unless you have a billionaire father, money will limit your options.Church or civil ceremony? If church, you need to find an agreeable minister and a location you can book. If you want a huge reception, then you may want a different site.My sister married in the State Forest. My brother, in our parent's house. I married in a reception hall at my college (room was free as long as we used the school's catering). Almost anything is possible, but I agree with your guy. None of the details matter, as long as you both want to get married. |
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1Sluccaddicy
Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 53
Location: Guatemala
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 2:03 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| I wouldn't invite some to the wedding and everyone to the reception. Think about that....how would you feel if someone thought you were okay to invite to the reception, but not the wedding or vice versa? That's just rude in my opinion. The bride generally pays for the wedding so if you want a small wedding, decide how many people.....say 100 and you get to invite 50 and he gets to invite 50. If you can only think of 25 to invite, then he gets 75......something like that. I'm sorry, but no one can be close to 200 people so if it's a small wedding you want, he'll just have to decide who he wants there the most. Most distant relatives understand not being invited if they know it's a small wedding. Anyway, talk it over with him and see what he says about it. |
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2kool4u
Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 26
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 2:11 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| The first thing you have to do is establish a budget. Then, you can start looking for your reception site. Go to theknot.com, they have good budgeting tools so that you don't overlook any of the expenses. They add up pretty quickly.I personally would be offended if I was invited to the reception but not the ceremony, but maybe that's just me.Good luck. |
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2inogeenfons
Joined: 10 Dec 2007
Posts: 22
Location: Honduras
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 2:19 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| You need to figure out your budget before you do anything else. Find out if anyone is going to be offering any $$ contributions so you can figure out what your budget is. Without a budget, there's no point in doing anything.www.brides.com/guidesSecond - go onto this site and go through everything on this list. Your ceremony/reception site should be first, everything else will fall into place once you have chosen your place for the ceremony and reception. Good luck and congrats. |
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2sassy
Joined: 13 Dec 2007
Posts: 18
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 2:27 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| Relax and enjoy the planning process. The biggest thing is to pick a maid of honor that you know FOR SURE will be a big help to you. It's a little bit difficult and nerve racking, but you will have memories of it for the rest of your life. I suggest a wedding planning book also. Good luck! |
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1sttimemommytobe07
Joined: 25 Nov 2007
Posts: 52
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 2:35 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| I would wait with wedding plans until he actually proposes. Unless you are the one doing the proposing, in which case, wait until he says yes. Then just have immediate family and maybe a few close friends at the wedding, and invite everyone else for the reception. |
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3333
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 25
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 2:43 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| Firstly congratulations!!Your panic is perfectly understandable as you have so much to do but I disagree with him saying you can do whatever you want. Get him involved and keep him involved.Get the free guide in the source box. It will give you hundreds of ideas and tips to get you started.I must warn you though that it does suggest you work together wherever possible.Good luck. You'll be fine. |
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237kk
Joined: 25 Nov 2007
Posts: 39
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 2:51 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| Personally I would elope - go to the courthouse and save all the dough for something important like the honeymoon or even a house - but that's me.Otherwise I would opt for a small intimate ceremony - with just your immediate family and punch and cake for refreshments.Then go on your honeymoon and enjoy yourselves.Later on - hold a "celebrate our marriage" reception where you can invite all the friends and family you want to.Oh - but you want to do it "the right way!"AH then, first thing is to sit down with fiance and families and set a date. At the same time discuss budget. Be realistic please - going hopelessly in debt - or expecting others to go hopelessly into debt - all for a one-day event is really unwise. But set a decent budget - and set 25% of that money aside as the "fudge factor" because there will always be something that comes up.Then with budget in hand, contact a wedding planner and sit down with them to go over details. And above all - keep cool about things. It's so easy to get bogged down into the details of making everything "perfect!!!!" that you start to slide into Bridezilla-land - and that's not a good thing. So keep pretty blaze about this or that minor detail. |
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45cal8341
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 16
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 2:59 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| www.theknot.com...........this will help you out tremendously, it helped me out big time when i planned my wedding. I had a small Victorian style wedding with only 30 guest and a big blow out bash of a reception and that is also where the bulk of the money was spent on. it is fun planning a wedding and reception when money is not a problem. go for it all have the one of your dreams i did. |
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1Sluccaddicy
Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 53
Location: Guatemala
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| Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 3:07 pm Post subject: Getting engaged...Whatever I want? |
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| Yes...don't send the guy next door the Christmas Card.oh, and by the way, MERRY CHRISTMAS! |
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