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short wedding ceremony?
 
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shootme



Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 5

PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 9:33 am    Post subject: short wedding ceremony? Reply with quote
currently our civil ceremony is 8 minutes long (not include processional or recessional). is this too short? should we maybe add a unity ceremony like wine sharing or unity candle? do guests actually like watching that stuff?our wedding and reception are at the same place. it's not a courthouse wedding, it's a typical wedding, it's just not religious.we are having one poem being read in the ceremony and also the officiant will be sharing advice that our parents have given to him to share with us. so it's not totally bare bones, it's just really short. i'm just not sure...all of the ceremonies i have been to have been long and boring (religious) so i just don't knowwe are having a close family member do it because in our state the couple can solemnize their own vows. he's a great speaker, very entertaining and engaging, but doesn't know jack about weddings!!!
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loki_only15177



Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 3

PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 9:51 am    Post subject: short wedding ceremony? Reply with quote
Um, is that worth the cost of a ceremony space rental!? Oh wait, its a civil ceremony... just you and a handful of people?! Shoot... short is sweet! Go for it.If you ARE payin for space, may i suggest a song or poem or hand written vowes?!? i dunno.as a guest, a 10 minute ceremony sounds FABULOUS! I'm a bit a.d.d. and am usually going "she looks pretty, that was sweet, wheres the DJ?" but tahts just the perspective of a typical guest!
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zeechou



Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 3

PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 10:09 am    Post subject: short wedding ceremony? Reply with quote
HI, I just got married like 2 months ago and my husband and I chose to have a short ceremony. We both wrote the ceremony, our brother in law who is ordained married us - he was ordained online - yeah, it's legal and how cool for it to be by someone who we totally dig.Then we had a cocktail party afterwards. it was very informal but very intimate. I was concerned that it would be too casual but it was really what we are like... chill, uncomplicated, creative. everyone said the wedding was one of the best and a few even said that it was exactly how they would want to have their wedding. In other words, it is about you and him and what you want to say.... you don't have to make yourself do stuff you don't really have any attachment to. there is no hard and fast rule as to how it has to be done other than the paperwork. Be creative and be yourselves... in the end you have to be happy with it rather than putting on a cookie cutter horse and pony show.
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nora1039



Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 10:27 am    Post subject: short wedding ceremony? Reply with quote
only add something if it has special meaning for you. Guests dont really care. They like the reception and like short. ceremonies
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iloveweddings3743



Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 6

PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 10:45 am    Post subject: short wedding ceremony? Reply with quote
Hi and congratulations!OK...I'm glad you added that extra info. I was going to ask if a unity candle is even allowed at a courthouse, but I see it is NOT at a courthouse.Yes, I would add a little more. People do like it short...but that is a little too short for me. I do like the wine sharing (have seen it once) or the unity candle (seen it lots) or there is the new sandy ceremony that is gaining in popularity. It just depends on what you two want.You could also read a special poem (or have someone else read it.) Good luck it sounds nice!
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Bromeliad3535



Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 11:03 am    Post subject: short wedding ceremony? Reply with quote
Most traditional ceremonies average 14 minutes--seriously! Unless there is a wedding mass and that sort of thing, but that isn't the case with you.Keep it at 8 minutes if that is what you want. The unity candle is lovely and makes great photos if you are having a photographer, but not necessary.In my experience, the guests are happy to see the ceremony and willing to enjoy the solemnity of it--but then, they are ready to relax with you and enjoy the reception.Best wishes!
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weddrev4542



Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 4

PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 11:21 am    Post subject: short wedding ceremony? Reply with quote
What does your officiant have to say about all this? They're the one you should be discussing this with. They should be tailoring your ceremony to your specs; they also need to be informed so that they can write the unity ceremony into the actual wedding ceremony. Unless they're just reading your ceremony out of a book. There's very few on the market.Do you r-e-a-l-l-y want to do the unity candle, wine, or some other unity ceremony?What do you want to say to your guests about your relationship? What do you want them to take with them after witnessing your ceremony? A ceremony doesn't have to have 'religion' to be meaningful & elegant.
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dudleydo



Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 3

PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 11:39 am    Post subject: short wedding ceremony? Reply with quote
Really, I like to believe that there is more to a wedding than a number of meaningless words made up to look like a well thought out ceremony. But then, I AM a Christian and I DO believe in God. Marriage blessed by God is so important. If you want to party, don't bother with any ceremony, just party. Anyway, Blessings and many happy years together is wished for you/
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sparkleythings_4you0258



Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 10

PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 11:57 am    Post subject: short wedding ceremony? Reply with quote
In the UK we don't do those sort of ceremonies (unity candles, sand ceremonies etc), I had never heard of anything like that til I started reading questions and answers here so I cannot comment on the guests enjoyment of them, as it is not something I am used to seeing done then to me it seems a little superfluous, I don't mean to offend anyone, customs differ from place to place I guess. I'd have a friend do a nice reading or something like that, civil ceremonies allow guests to read non-religious poetry, that could add a few minutes and make it a bit more personal.
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