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seahawkfanabc
Joined: 19 Nov 2007
Posts: 19
Location: US
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 Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 5:31 pm Post subject: is it ok to get married at the courthouse and then have a re |
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| seems okay to me. Just don't never have a wedding because you can't afford it or anything. Set a date (even if it's a few years out) and plan towards that. |
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Seablesahbaro
Joined: 29 Dec 2007
Posts: 46
Location: USA
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| Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 6:00 pm Post subject: is it ok to get married at the courthouse and then have a re |
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| NO.If you get married at the Court House, there is NO NEED to get married again. You would be already married and it makes no sense what-so-ever to do it again. |
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searchaaj
Joined: 02 May 2007
Posts: 15
Location: USA
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| Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 6:30 pm Post subject: is it ok to get married at the courthouse and then have a re |
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| YES! Believe it or not, there are a good number of couples that do this. Many couples who choose to marry at the courthouse now and have a real wedding later usually do this so they can either save up money to pay for a real wedding later or they want to hold off so everyone they would like at their wedding to be in attendance. |
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searchbab
Joined: 01 May 2007
Posts: 16
Location: USA
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| Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 6:59 pm Post subject: is it ok to get married at the courthouse and then have a re |
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| Sorry - I know it's not the answer you want, but you only get one wedding. If it's at the courthouse - that is your wedding. It doesn't matter how good your reasons for wanting to do it are (he's in the military and shipping out, you need insurance, whatever - one wedding per couple)You can choose to have a vow renewal at a later date, but make sure your guest know it is a vow renewal and celebration of a marriage that has ALREADY HAPPENED. If you lie or try to conceal it, you run a very real risk of permanently damaging your relationship with your (and his) friends and family.And really, do you want to start your married life off on a lie? Somehow that just doesn't bode well. |
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Seashell
Joined: 27 Dec 2007
Posts: 18
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| Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 7:28 pm Post subject: is it ok to get married at the courthouse and then have a re |
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| Is it Ok to have a quickie ceremony to get health insurance then have a big vow renewal.....yes. Is it OK to lie to guests and pretend you never got married at the courthouse.....heck no. |
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searchaaa
Joined: 30 Apr 2007
Posts: 49
Location: USA
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| Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 7:57 pm Post subject: is it ok to get married at the courthouse and then have a re |
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| My fiance and I have been engaged for over 4 years. We are actually getting married in 2 weeks at the courthouse because we think it's time, but we don't have the money saved up quite yet. However, it isn't a secret. We are still saving up money, and in December we will have a reception (the actual wedding celebration), where I will wear my gown and he his tux, and all of our friends and family will be there. We will re-enact the trading of our vows, and the presenting of the rings for our friends and family's sake. Getting married in the courthouse is not a decision I feel I am going to regret, but I will also have my dream reception. Not everybody needs to be there for the tedious paperwork. ; )However, this is a decision that YOU need to make. It is YOUR day, YOUR wedding, and regardless of what people say, it is the most important day of a girl's life!! Good luck with all you do, and I hope you come up with the right decision!! |
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Seashell
Joined: 27 Dec 2007
Posts: 18
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| Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 8:26 pm Post subject: is it ok to get married at the courthouse and then have a re |
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| Hi. I agree with KC.Unfortunately you and a number of brides have the "real" wedding confused. If you so choose to be married at the courthouse....that IS your "real wedding." Why the do-over after? If you want to get married at the courthouse...there is nothing wrong with that! Many couples do! But do not deceive your family and friends by inviting them to a "do-over" wedding, because, in fact, it will not be a wedding. It will be a vow renewal. A wedding is between an unmarried man and woman, not a married couple. Have a courthouse wedding and a reception after if that is what you want. If you want the big white dress thing...best to wait. |
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searchaaa
Joined: 30 Apr 2007
Posts: 49
Location: USA
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| Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 8:56 pm Post subject: is it ok to get married at the courthouse and then have a re |
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| Only if the secret is really secret. Don't tell your best friend, your mother, or anybody else (except the HR people involved in getting you on his insurance and be sure to tell them to respect your privacy here.) Be prepared to confide in the officiant as well. Other than this, I don't know of any way to "have your cake and eat it too." |
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sealink2
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 16
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| Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:25 pm Post subject: is it ok to get married at the courthouse and then have a re |
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| My husband and I went and got legally married, two days after being engaged and had the actual ceremony 7 weeks later. Only my sister, dad, his sons, and best friend knew. None of the family or work knew because we kept it a secret! We wanted to get it legal sooner than I would have been able to throw together a wedding. I wouldn't change it for anything! We consider our anniversary the day I wore the white dress. I think it is perfectly acceptable! Best wishes! |
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