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AASA
Joined: 24 Jan 2008
Posts: 5
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 Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 3:12 pm Post subject: Early marriage? |
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| Okay, having a child that is a preteen boy and starting to show some interest in girls, as a muslim, what do you feel is better, letting them get married at an early age or forcing them to wait until after college when they have a stronger chance of falling into sin away from family?I have debated this with several of my friends and it is actually about half and half but I would like opinions from others on this as well. |
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deeplydisturbed
Joined: 24 Jan 2008
Posts: 1
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| Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 3:53 pm Post subject: Early marriage? |
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| all guys are going to show an interest in girls when they're teens. i mean alot of kids are looked upon as "respectful" and "halal" people. but at school they're completely different. heck alot of them have girlfriends.talk to him about in. [its natural that hes interested in girls, be grateful. at least he is not, gaai]and let him marry when hes in his early 20s. or whenever hes ready. |
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alliumtuberosum
Joined: 24 Jan 2008
Posts: 3
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| Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 4:34 pm Post subject: Early marriage? |
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| Early marriages are originally recommended for Muslims; it is healthy and helps for chastity. Delay of marriages is very helpful for the Shaytan. Almighty Allah says: "And marry such of you as are solitary and the pious of your slaves and maid servants. If they be poor; Allah will enrich them of His bounty. Allah is of ample means, Aware." (An-Nur: 32)The father of a girl must not delay marriage of his daughter if a proposal is received from a compatible man of equal status who is of sound religion and character. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "Three matters should not be delayed: prayer when its time comes, burial when the funeral has arrived, and the marriage of a single woman when a well-suited man has proposed." (Reported by at-Tirmidhi)The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) addressed the youths encouraging them to get married as soon as they are capable of shouldering the responsipility of marriage saying: “O youth! Whoever amongst you is able to marry, let him marry, because it helps him keep his eyes away from lustful looks and preserve his chastity. And whoever is not able to marry, let him observe fasting, as it is a shield for him (i.e. protection from lapsing in fornication).”Early marriage doesn't mean that the spouses could be not mature and responsible, the Qur'an hints saying: "If you find them of sound judgement." (An-Nisa': 6) That means puberty or marriageable age is not enough to be qualified for marriage. If a son is capable to run a household life and he is able to maitain mentally, psychologically and financially and everything of his wife, then early marriage is the only way to keep our children away from haram.In this context, Dr. Muhammad Sa`eed Hawwa, professor of Shari`ah at the University of Mu’tah, Jordan, states:"Early marriage is recommended as long as the requirements of marriage are met including the ability of each of the spouses to fulfill his marital duties and protect his/her partner against temptation. The husband should also be able to shoulder the financial responsibilities at the sufficiency level. There is no specific age for marriage according to Shari`ah but the criterion is the capability of both spouses."Among the benefits of early marriages is that "Married couples perform better at school or university and are more emotionally stable than singles. Also, living together with one's wife will cost one much less than if each one of them lived separately. The benefits of early marriage are extreme and it is highly encouraged in Islam if both of spouses are mature and responsible, and if the husband can support the family on the financial side." Excerpted, with modifications, from: www.islamicity.com |
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Smiley8368
Joined: 24 Jan 2008
Posts: 2
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| Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 5:15 pm Post subject: Early marriage? |
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| Let him marry when you find an acceptable and compatible woman. Start looking early. If he marries before he is financially independent, you can help them out, the same as you would help him if he were single. The woman's family can help financially too, if they like. There is no disadvantage and much advantage to being married while studying, as long as they take measures to delay having children until after they both have completed sufficient studies for one of them to take a break to give time to the child. |
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MARS
Joined: 24 Jan 2008
Posts: 1
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| Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 5:56 pm Post subject: Early marriage? |
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| you should first educate him about the moral values that Islam teaches and leave the choice of marriage up to him. but you should also let him know before marriage that he should be capable of earning enough money so that he can support a family with it. |
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BOYCOTTISRAELTHEIRFRIENDS
Joined: 24 Jan 2008
Posts: 12
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| Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 6:37 pm Post subject: Early marriage? |
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| salam 2all,save them from sin...i was listein to this talk and the brother said if your child comes to you say "i want to get married! let them get married" this talk was on "islamic tube"at that age there too shy to say"mum and dad! i want to get married"if he or she is lookin at girls and boy then let them get married...keep them away from sin...sin is Evil... |
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RuchjatK
Joined: 24 Jan 2008
Posts: 4
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| Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 7:19 pm Post subject: Early marriage? |
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| Yes in Islam early marriage but after grown up is allowed but it is not a compulsory.Grown up muslim woman is about 9 upto 15 years old and grown up fo male is about 15 upto 18 years old.A grown up male and grown up female can no meet each only both of them because the third will be satan or iblis or bed jinn.It is dangerous.Female wrown up should go out her home accompanied by her muhrim(member of family or relative that can not be married with her such as her brother)She should wear hijab so her body can be seen by others.If a male muslim has qrown up and he could not control his sex desires the parents should give advice to him for fasting.But if he is still can control it ,his parents should make a married party with the female who is wanted by their son..The parents should ask for permission of the female's parents before marriage and give a marriage gift or mahar.But in the modern society now a muslim man should prepare himself to be well educated and seek job before he got married..So now the everage male is 24 up to 30 and the average female is 18 upto 25 for marriage.So they can maintain a happy family and have enough income for raising their children.The early marriage now is only for male and female muslim. children. of rich parents. |
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IsmailEliat
Joined: 24 Jan 2008
Posts: 8
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| Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 8:00 pm Post subject: Early marriage? |
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| The Prophet Muhammad (p.b.u.h.) : "O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty. And whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes one's sexual power".Firstly both must be matured. Secondly the age varies from people to people. Some are big in size but small in age and others are big in age and small in size. So go ahead when everything is prepared mentally and physically and best ASAP (as soon as possible) |
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