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kiwi
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 9
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 Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 10:58 am Post subject: i really need serious help... and therapy isn't an option fo |
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| i found out that my best friend was raped. i dont know what to do. beacuse i never told her what happened to me...i was raped by a kid at a party.not to mention by my dad too...i could only prove that my dad did. and he got off with 5 years in jail.alot of my best friends have passed away.the only thing i have right now is my fiancee. we have been engaged for almost a year which started in highschool. we can't afford to have a wedding right now. i've told him what has happened and i feel so bad for putting it on him. i don't know what to do anymore. he's the most amazing person i have ever met and has changed my life so much. he's more then i could have ever asked for and i feel really blessed to have him.but even with him. im still really struggling. i've fucked up so many times with myself and its hurt him. i know it still does to know the things i've tried to do. like not living.i can't handle all this. i feel so... dirty. used. i need help. |
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KlaasSit
Joined: 02 Jun 2007
Posts: 22
Location: USA
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 12:52 pm Post subject: i really need serious help... and therapy isn't an option fo |
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| If your dad was convicted and went to jail then you would have had counselling ..so what are you saying here?What kid ? your story is full of holes ...Why cant you have therapy who is stopping you ?Sort it out .... |
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Kondorris
Joined: 14 Jun 2007
Posts: 17
Location: United Kingdom
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 2:46 pm Post subject: i really need serious help... and therapy isn't an option fo |
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| I know how you must feel but think of it this way, you have come so far by allowing love in your life again, case and point your fiance. What you have to realize that it was not your fault, rape isnt about sex it is about power. It seems like you have a hold on your issues and what you personally have to do to make it along....Take your time you do not have to rush. Think about the good person you are inside and go from there, I am no therapist but I have had some experiences that I didn't realize was cause for my pain as I got older, but I began to cope and started realizing the patterns and I try not to make the same mistakes, also only god can judge you, no one else. so let it all go, at your own pace. Thank god you have someone close enough to you that understands what you are going through. Good Luck |
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Klavinkas
Joined: 15 Jun 2007
Posts: 7
Location: United Kingdom
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 4:41 pm Post subject: i really need serious help... and therapy isn't an option fo |
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It's not easy but it seems like you're doing well already, you are lucky to have him and he is probably lucky to have you! You are a strong woman and It takes so much courage to turn in your father and to tell your fiancee the truth. You should'nt feel dirty or used because it was NOT YOUR FAULT! and you have done the best you could and should be proud you've come so far. You deserve hapiness and life as much as anyone on this earth and yes it is rough but you have that courage in you already and you have love. As long as you have that you can face anything that may come. Don't give up on yourself or your fiancee and the people that love you because to then YOU are also a blessing.  Good Luck |
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Kmott1678
Joined: 21 Jan 2008
Posts: 4
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 6:35 pm Post subject: i really need serious help... and therapy isn't an option fo |
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| As hard as it will be, you should tell her. It will help her feel less alone. I'm so sorry that you had to endure rape and that your father only got 5 years in jail. And congrats on your engagement. I'm glad that you have someone who makes you happy. Don't feel bad for telling him what happened. What if it was the other way around? Wouldn't you want him to talk to you? Whenever you feel upset, talk to him about it. I really admire you for being so strong. I wish you the best of luck and I hope that everything works out. Remember, none of this was your fault!!! |
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Kitikat
Joined: 24 Jan 2008
Posts: 4
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 8:29 pm Post subject: i really need serious help... and therapy isn't an option fo |
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| If its for financial reasons that you cant seek psychological treatment. There are some options. Just check out some of your local Psychologists and they can reduce the price significantly.especially if you are considering suicide. you NEED TO SEEK HELP. BY ALL MEANS. sweetheart dont leave these feelings all locked up. that is dangerous territory that you are treading in.Good Luck Dont Give Up. |
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KixSwiniA
Joined: 01 Oct 2007
Posts: 31
Location: Canada
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 10:23 pm Post subject: i really need serious help... and therapy isn't an option fo |
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| You have been through a lot. Understand this for a fact that the bad things that happened to you were not your wish or choice, so you are not to blame. Past cannot be changed, though painful and troublesome, just let it be.In the present be happy for yourself, you deserve it, you deserve a normal healthy happy life.You have talked about it with him okay, just don't press the issue if he has accepted it than that's settled and you can move forward. Easier said than done i agree, but don't spoil your future for your past.You have been strong and you can do this for yourself. Be happy. |
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Korina
Joined: 24 Nov 2007
Posts: 6
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| Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 12:18 am Post subject: i really need serious help... and therapy isn't an option fo |
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| helloFirst of all i want to say it takes a big hearted person to admit that they feel ashamed of hurting herself. You must know that God works in mysterious ways and has brought you to meet this wonderful man who has assisted in changing your life. You are blessed! I'm deeply sorry for the pain that resides in your soul, believe me, you can and will go on to a better life ahead. Hang in there, keep the faith, through God all things can happen. If you believe in your heart and soul in him, you will find comfort in knowing he's at your side at all times. He is using your fiance to guide and protect you. Especially since your dad was not the protector. God provided for you sweetie. You have much pain and my heart hurts for you as well. It'll get better I promise, keep seeking God and talk to him when you're alone, trust me. Best wishes always..... ; ) |
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