|
|
joshuameshel
Joined: 24 Nov 2007
Posts: 9
|
 Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 5:30 am Post subject: Should I Postpone? |
 |
|
|
| My fiancee's grandfather is in the hospital after having a heart attack last week and a triple bypass. They kept him sedated for a few days, then on Friday, he had another heart attack. This is a big thing for everyone in his family. I am getting married on May 10, and invitations are already out, people are already planning to come up here to WA from Oregon, I have my dress, time off for him, the wedding party and me, honeymoon tickets and trip booked and a deposit on the church. His parents already expressed that they don't want to have the wedding in case something bad with his grandpa happens (like death) which I understand, but I don't want to wait and have something happen a week prior. My mom has put a lot of money into this that she would be losing. I am thinking of postponing it, but we have already planned so much! What do you think we should do?My fiancee agrees with his parents, where if anything were to happen, we should cancel it. I can see his point, but I kinda think that we should still have it, we have been postponing it for about a year now. We may just get married in Vegas, my mom offered to fly us down there to ease the tension. I was just really looking forward to an actual wedding, since both of our parent's got married in Vegas. Thank you all for your advice and support, I want you all to know how much I truly appreciate. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
 |
homesven
Joined: 05 Jul 2007
Posts: 4
|
| Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 7:36 am Post subject: Should I Postpone? |
|
|
|
| You poor thing... That is so hard!What does your fiance think?? It's his family...I am getting married on May 10 as well, and Many of my guests are travelling interstate, so I guess if it was me at this point I would still go ahead.. with my fiances blessing. His feelings are more important to me than his parents.I understand and feel for his parents possibly losing a father.. But I really think that the wedding can still go on. Just remember they are already grieving and that is all they can focus on at the moment, so approach it gently. If he does sadly pass away before hand, make sure you pay a special tribute to him at the wedding.Good luck... Please don't let sad circumstance take too much shine off your special day.. ;o) |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
InterioV
Joined: 01 Apr 2008
Posts: 2
Location: USA
|
| Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 9:41 am Post subject: Should I Postpone? |
|
|
|
| Sorry I think grandpa would want you to go ahead with your wedding. Too much money and time is invested. You will lose a lot. Think about it, in a large family someone will be unable to attend due to illness. This is YOUR big day. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
ica2905
Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 11
|
| Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 11:46 am Post subject: Should I Postpone? |
|
|
|
| Out of respect for your fiance's grandfather and his entire family I agree with you, you need to postpone. The family will respect you much more if you don't try and push this through during such a trying time for their family, which will soon be YOUR FAMILY as well. Contact all of your people and reschedule |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
GoodDaysv
Joined: 03 Sep 2007
Posts: 6
Location: Tramadol
|
| Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 1:51 pm Post subject: Should I Postpone? |
|
|
|
| It's really a tough situation...my uncle died a few days before his stepsons wedding and they still had it. It was a month before my wedding, and we honored him and my other uncle with a moment of silence and a few words before we continued the ceremony...so if the unfortunate should happen thats a really nice way of recognizing a loved one.It's impossible to tell the future..I would discuss it more with your fiance and see what he is most comfortable with. I think for now you probably should not postpone it.**EDIT**After reading other posts I agree with the lady below me that said you never know when it will happen, he could be perfectly fine and you reschedule it and he then could pass. If worse comes to worst, go have a shot gun wedding then have a nice reception after wards...and I also agree with the guy that said take the honeymoon "vacation" regardless. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
JaemyP1563
Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 6
|
| Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 3:57 pm Post subject: Should I Postpone? |
|
|
|
| The wedding is not about the money thats going in and all the stuff. Its about having an amazing day, where you are the happiest you have ever been. If anything were to happen to your fiancees grandfather, it would make you and your fiancee unhappy, and your fiancees family too. It would set a horrible mood for the day. Is that the kind of risk you want to take? |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
GooFBabe
Joined: 05 May 2007
Posts: 10
Location: Belgia
|
| Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 6:02 pm Post subject: Should I Postpone? |
|
|
|
| It's a very difficult situation and it's going to be hard to please everyone. You haven't said how your fiancee feels about it, but if he will be supportive of your decision I think you should go ahead with your wedding as planned. The grandfather may die next week or next month or he could recover and live for years - how often might you need to postpone? Your fiancee's parents should realize that people die, but life must still go on. The feelings of your own mother should not take a back seat to fears about something that might not even happen. She will not only lose a lot of money, but imagine the disappointment of all her plans coming to nothing.Go ahead and have a wonderful day and future life together. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Jobekeege
Joined: 10 Nov 2007
Posts: 12
Location: Brazil
|
| Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 8:07 pm Post subject: Should I Postpone? |
|
|
|
| It is very difficult. You need to discuss this with your finace and find out how he really feels about it. I think you should go ahead with the wedding. If grandpa passes away before, honor him at the weddin gin a special way. You could have a reserved seat for him and mention him in the ceremony. You could place a candle in the seat or a card with his name on it. Good luck! |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
gesechofe
Joined: 03 Apr 2008
Posts: 3
Location: USA
|
| Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 10:12 pm Post subject: Should I Postpone? |
|
|
|
| Discuss the issue with your fiancee, and see if the Grandfather is lucid enough to express his opinion. After all, if he thinks you should go through with it regardless, you won't have to feel guilty.Next, compromise.Let everyone know that the two of you may have to postpone the wedding...and why. You can reschedule the wedding in a couple of months if necessary.If worst comes to worst, and the gentleman dies, postpone the wedding, but take the vacation, just the two of you.I wish you luck, and best wishes. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
GreenGuuyh
Joined: 02 Nov 2007
Posts: 9
Location: Fioricet
|
| Posted: Mon Apr 14, 2008 12:17 am Post subject: Should I Postpone? |
|
|
|
| Don't cancel or postpone the wedding unless your fiance's grandfather dies at a time that would cause arrangements to conflict with the wedding.Discuss the situation with the church, with your reception hall, with anyone whose business might be affected by a change in your schedule. Most of them will work with you given the circumstances.The key to this is to be flexible. Life is full of variables and the death of an older person is one of the more predictable of these. (We will all die--hopefully at a very advanced age.)Just make sure that everyone who might be affected by a change in schedule is in the loop as to what is going on and how it might impact your plans.I would bet the grandfather would give pretty much the same advice to you. Most of us, when we get a little older, don't want the world to stop because we are sick or dying.Good luck and God bless. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
|
|
Welcome!
Welcome to WeddingPhotographersforum.com. Wedding photographers chat and discussion forum
Wedding Industry News
Wedding Industry News, Professional Wedding Photographer News
Feedback and Suggestions
Let us know your feedback & suggestions to help us improve WeddingPhotographersForum.com
Everything About Your Wedding
Wedding Marketplace
Buy and sale all wedding related products.
Where and How to Start?
There’s so much to do, it can be mind-numbing. Don’t worry. I planned and held my first wedding in two months and my second wedding in three months. If you have the luxury of a year or more, feel lucky!
Wedding Invitation
Ideally, invitations should be mailed out 6-8 weeks before the big day to give guests time to make arrangements to attend and RSVP back to you.
Wedding Attire
Where I come from, buying a tuxedo is virtually unheard of. Renting is probably the way to go to realize the ultimate savings on the groom’s attire.
Wedding Flowers
Cheap doesn't mean that your wedding flowers can't be beautiful. All flowers are lovely no matter what they cost.
Wedding Ceremony Decoration
Most wedding ceremonies are short and sweet, so why spend a majority...
Wedding Music
Music for your wedding ceremony could consist of live or recorded performances.
Wedding Photography
Pictures are priceless, and you want to be sure you have plenty of good pictures of your special day.
Wedding Favors
Some brides don’t like the idea of giving gifts to her guests, but we think it’s a nice gesture as a thank you...
Wedding Food
Wedding food can take a huge chunk out of your wedding budget.
Wedding Cake
Your wedding cake is the centerpiece of the reception. It is a scrumptious dessert as well as part of a tradition
Wedding Party
The question of whether or not to serve alcohol at your wedding is one that can cause dissension in the ranks of family.
|
FAQ
Search
Usergroups
Register
Profile
Log in to check your private messages
Log in
