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jess4rsake
Joined: 24 Nov 2007
Posts: 9
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 Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 4:39 am Post subject: MOH question...Am I being unreasonable?? |
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| So I asked my best friend to be my MOH even though we have not been as close as me and a couple of my other friend recently. She was very happy and excited. She told me she was going to buy the cake and a couple other things.....then she came back and said she could not afford to do that stuff because she had to through the shower, I was total fine with that. I know she does not have a lot of money then she did not call me for about 2 weeks. I had so many things going on I was really upset so I called her and asked her to come over and help (i was in tears i was very stressed) she told me she could not come but would call later then she never called me. Because the wedding is in a month another friend decided to through a shower for me so I called her today and asked her if she could come she told me she could not make it she had to work and is to broke to miss the shift (at her job she can easily take off) BUT that she would "send" me a gift... I told her not to worry about she askedMe if I was upset? I told her I was because she had not been there to help plan and now she was not coming to the shower that she was suppose be throwing. She is mad because I dont understand.....I have not got mad at her even once till today when she said she was not coming to the shower am I wrong??She did get her dress but the dress "she picked" needed to be altered and she has not done that yet and the wedding is July 19th |
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GansDitrixGanher
Joined: 28 Feb 2008
Posts: 25
Location: Germany
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| Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 7:10 am Post subject: MOH question...Am I being unreasonable?? |
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| You're not in the wrong at all. You've given her plenty of opportunities. She seems interested and sincerely busy, but sometimes that's not a good enough reason. She's known about this for awhile, and had plenty of time to plan it and everything. Has she even got her dress?EDIT: I honestly don't know what to tell you. Tell her she needs to get that stuff done really soon or you'll have to get someone else... That's not fair to you at all to have to deal with that. You haven't been unreasonable with her at all. |
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dMae712
Joined: 24 Jan 2008
Posts: 16
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| Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 9:41 am Post subject: MOH question...Am I being unreasonable?? |
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| i agree with kfred. |
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fizzystuff9888
Joined: 11 Feb 2008
Posts: 30
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| Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 12:12 pm Post subject: MOH question...Am I being unreasonable?? |
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| She needed to turn you down in the beginning. This is not only disappointing you, but she has to be feeling like a real loser. How reliable was she before? Ask if she is still interested in being MOH, if so ask one of your new friends to please help pick up the slack, a good friend well without pressure to become your new MOH. If she is not interested, be sure she means it, forgive her and replace her. |
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hasicit4460
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 7
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| Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 2:43 pm Post subject: MOH question...Am I being unreasonable?? |
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| I think she bit off more than she can chew and it took her some time to realize it. Gently probe to find out what is bothering her. It is probably a money issue. Focus on her, not you. Give her a way to back out of being the MOH. I'll bet she does. Make sure to tell her that you want her at the wedding. Have a back up plan for another MOH.My daughter just got married that's how I ended up here. Now back to the fishing section.Good Luck - I know it will work out just fine. Make it happen that way. You can do it so it is best for both of you. |
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J-MaN2325
Joined: 25 Nov 2007
Posts: 4
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| Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 5:14 pm Post subject: MOH question...Am I being unreasonable?? |
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| Do not stress thats my first advance, Maybe your being a little unreasonable, 1st of all no one really planned my shower, it was a last minute deal, you know who helped me with my wedding my mom, my moh lived 2 far away, some people dont have anyone to help them with anything, so be happy you have friends that care, by the way it is "tradition" to have your moh throw your shower but its not mandatory, plus most traditions now a days have been thrown to the way side, and most brides are picking and choosing which traditions they want to keep alive. Maybe she is broke, and shes needs the money so that she can get you a nice gift, or even make it to your big day. I understand where you would be upset by also try to understand where she is coming from. Everything is going to come together you will see, dont let stress come in between you and a friendship. good luck and congrats |
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hunnjgtfdc
Joined: 25 Jan 2008
Posts: 18
Location: Snickk
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| Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 7:45 pm Post subject: MOH question...Am I being unreasonable?? |
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| At this point you need to just get up enough courage to call and ask if she is still going to be in the wedding. She took the position but has not lived up to it. You do not want to be standing there without a maid of honor. Just ask if she is still willing to do it. If not, you are ok with it and understand... That way you can at least get another in there and plan your wedding without this stress. |
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InCali
Joined: 17 Mar 2008
Posts: 3
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| Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2008 10:15 pm Post subject: MOH question...Am I being unreasonable?? |
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| fire her as your MOH, consider someone else. but then again you said she's broke, so maybe she dont have the money yet for alteration. but if the wedding is next month, you need to consider telling her that you dint think it would work out. shes bringing you too much stress. |
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