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GalaxieGirl
Joined: 12 Feb 2008
Posts: 20
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 Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 7:51 pm Post subject: I had a dream last night that I need help with? |
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I also need a bit of relationship help which is tied in to it if possible. Lately I have been feeling not as sexually attracted to my man as I used to be. We have been in a committed relationship for over 4 years and we are now married (Which hasn't even changed anything except for my name). We lived together for a while before we got married, so nothing much has changed, it was just a fun ceremony and honeymoon. Ok yes now that that's explained...I was extremely attracted all the time to Chris in the first two years, but after that it gradually started to go down and now when we do it I don't even feel like I am having that much fun. I mean it's not bad persay, it's just, not fun or exciting anymore. I don't think I even have a G-spot (I have been trying to find it for years using many recommended methods, so I think I just don't have one), which doesn't help the situation. We are also both VERY busy people. But yes, basically, I think it is partly because his weight has fluctuated a lot too, and since we first got together, where he is at right now I would say he is about 20 - 30 lbs. over. It's not attractive on him. So last night it was his birthday, and I tried to spice it up a bit, and we also delved into our fantasy, and it was just kinda fun. I went to sleep comfy (By the way we have absolutely no issues with the love and cuddly part of our relationship). I am perfectly fine with that, I just want my sexual part to be more alive with him. I find myself to be able to have sexual thoughts about other men, but not necessarily him. Back to the story again.....I went to sleep comfy, and then I had a horrible dream that I got pregnant (And we DON'T want that right now, maybe not ever) and I didn't even know about it for a month or so! There was no morning sickness or anything! It was weird! So how do you think this dream ties in to my current issue in my relationship, and also, do any of you have any useful suggestions at all for my relationship issue in general? He's still very attracted to me he says, so he's fine. It's just me having the issue.P.S. I will mention that my husband and I talk about EVERYTHING and this is very good for us because we know each other's innermost thoughts and desires. So he knows I am not that horny for him anymore, but he just doesn't know what to do about it either! He is trying to lose weight right now too, so maybe that will help me be more attracted to him again. I think sometimes it's just a matter of the fact that I already know him so well and there's no more mystery perhaps. I need to get to the next level of sexuality with him where it's more based on a love level. He said he went through the same thing like this with me, but after a while he became attracted to me again and this time it was even better because now his level of sexual feelings for me were based on feelings of love too. Sounds not so fun to me! I just want to feel sexually attracted! But maybe if I were to feel what this level of excitement is, I would like it tooI will also remind you that like I said, we are very much in love and both still very committed to one another. I already mentioned that as far as the love part goes I am SET. It is just this other issue. I am adding these extra details because I think someone in a previous post misunderstood me, so to avoid anyone else misunderstanding as well I decided to add these details. That is all  .Ok enough harassment, is there anyone out there willing to seriously help me and not post an idiotic comment?Haha I like your answer Dr. Wiley you're hilarious...everyone seems to be pretty on with their answers...keep 'em coming people!Yes I definitely have told Chris that I don't want a baby anytime soon, possibly never. And he's pretty sure he wants one but is willing to wait...and maybe he'll feel the same way I do in a few years as well...we just have to give that part of it a little time...but as for the sex, yes I am hoping in the meantime to have great babyless sex!Ok Dr. Wiley all of a sudden your answer just changed...and no I am not stressed out in my life. I feel very busy, but confident about it - not stressed. Thanks for the tip though! |
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Galiloera
Joined: 12 Jul 2007
Posts: 64
Location: UK
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| Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 10:21 pm Post subject: I had a dream last night that I need help with? |
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| was it wet |
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GalsGelf
Joined: 22 Dec 2007
Posts: 80
Location: US
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| Posted: Sat Aug 16, 2008 12:51 am Post subject: I had a dream last night that I need help with? |
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| tl;dr |
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Galileos
Joined: 28 May 2007
Posts: 44
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Sat Aug 16, 2008 3:21 am Post subject: I had a dream last night that I need help with? |
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| wow u can talk |
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gamer_077
Joined: 21 Mar 2008
Posts: 51
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| Posted: Sat Aug 16, 2008 5:51 am Post subject: I had a dream last night that I need help with? |
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| did you really expect me to read all that .. uhhh no! |
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gamuttime
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 13
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| Posted: Sat Aug 16, 2008 8:21 am Post subject: I had a dream last night that I need help with? |
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| i agree with Hamster Sauce |
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Gambibouffhib
Joined: 10 Nov 2007
Posts: 74
Location: USA
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| Posted: Sat Aug 16, 2008 10:51 am Post subject: I had a dream last night that I need help with? |
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| I'm no expert, but I think the dream signifies that you may feel trapped in some sense. It's great that the rest of your relationship is in good shape because this means that this can be worked on.I think you are just board. There is no spice left. That happens to the best relationships. Good luck! |
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GainAnna
Joined: 05 Jul 2008
Posts: 22
Location: USA
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| Posted: Sat Aug 16, 2008 1:21 pm Post subject: I had a dream last night that I need help with? |
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| idk wut to tell you about the sexually attractive thing but as for the dream maybe its something your scared of with sex or maybe you want a child subconciously hope your problem gets better and hoped a hellped a little bit |
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Gallevsis
Joined: 15 Apr 2007
Posts: 75
Location: UK
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| Posted: Sat Aug 16, 2008 3:51 pm Post subject: I had a dream last night that I need help with? |
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| Usually when two people are having problems satisfying one another it usually means the value of the relationship has taken a turn. You have been together a while and your lives are busy, (which doesn't help) and your dream is only your subconscious mind telling you that you fear getting into a long term commitment, but not what you think, it may not be the (having a baby) is what you fear but what the baby means: Commitment, more busy, money, tied down, more responsibilities and with your sexual desires taking you outside the relationship ( metaphorically speaking) you are fearing it going the other way instead of the exciting way you wanted for each other. It's sounds like you both need a holiday, one with each other and one without. it helps trust me. |
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GalaxieGirl9718
Joined: 08 Jun 2008
Posts: 42
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| Posted: Sat Aug 16, 2008 6:21 pm Post subject: I had a dream last night that I need help with? |
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| Did you ever think that you might be too stressed out at work?Stress can effect sex-drive and cause bad dreams... hmmm. |
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GalaxieGirl9718
Joined: 08 Jun 2008
Posts: 42
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| Posted: Sat Aug 16, 2008 8:51 pm Post subject: I had a dream last night that I need help with? |
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| well first he needs to find some time to get to the gym and get into shape. Maybe youre just not feeling it as before because of the weight which can be changed if he commits his time to some hrs in the gym... lets say hes got a job and got no time then theres TONS of videos on youtube that are workout videos that can be done at home... and the sexual life just cant help you with that BUT try this .. do something exotic, go on a vacation and i once saw this on tv about relationships that the partners should have a long maybe 10 second kiss everyday... i heard it helps..i think the dream you had goes two ways... **sorry.... (im not offending you or harassing you in anyway but these are possibilities....) maybe you getting pregnant is a message that just because your not attracted to your husband dont go sleep with someone else or it might also mean that having a child with your husband might change the situation at hand ... but i still stand by that its just his physical appearance an d give him some time and tell him to hit the gym... and if he still cant find the time just eat right and he'll be in shape..* sorry but this just reminds me alot about "king of queens" ... hey at the end they chose to have a child lol im not encouraging you to have a child no no that was just a joke...anyways hope this helps and hope you get through this.. |
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