Wedding Photographers Forum - Forum Index Internet Business Forum
 
 RSS FAQFAQ   SearchSearch    UsergroupsUsergroups   RegisterRegister 
 ProfileProfile   Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages   Log inLog in 
What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear
Goto page Previous  1, 2 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Wedding Photographers Forum - Forum Index // Wedding Attire
Author Message
boazchic07



Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 6:22 am    Post subject: What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear Reply with quote
I had the same problem, the way I fixed it was you know them pants that looks like skirts? I got her a pair of them and then I matched the color of the top to my other bridesmaid dresses. To balance it out and not look bad my husbands best man wore something different then the other groomsmen. Everyone thought it was creative and thought it was a good idea to let people know who was who. Nobody even knew the real reason why we did it.
Back to top
QueenQueso7596



Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 8

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 6:27 am    Post subject: What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear Reply with quote
I get that she doesn't want to 'compromise herself for others' but what she's not seeing is that she's trying to make you compromise yourself for her.This is your wedding, and the knowledge that she will have to comply to a specific dress code is something that should have been understood when she agreed to be the Maid of Honor. That said, I do think it looks very nice when the Maid of Honor wears something different than the other girls, so her wearing dress pants instead of a skirt would look fine. The fact that she cried trying shirts on, to me, seems like a bright red flashing neon sign saying 'MANIPULATOR' to me. I've looked at the seprates on David Bridal's website, and while some of them are ridiculously frilly and girly, some are perfectly fine. How about Versatile Top #172? It looks like nothing more than a plain old tank top that you can get in your wedding color. If she won't even make that concession for you, I think it's time to re-evaluate how much this 'friendship' means to the both of you.
Back to top
jeannielunchbox



Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 6

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 6:33 am    Post subject: What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear Reply with quote
seriously, if she accepted maid of honor, she also accepted what you want her to wear. it is a luxury for bridesmaids to have a say in what they wear. you pick something that you are comfortable with, whether or not she has a say in it. you have the last word. i personally think a pants suit is inappropriate for a maid of honor in a wedding, but it's your wedding.
Back to top
VioletPearl



Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 6:39 am    Post subject: What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear Reply with quote
Get her a two-piece skirt/suit like this one:http://www.chadwicks.com/clothing/Crinkled-Jacket-Dress.aspx?PfId=107698&DeptId=8219&ProductTypeId=1&PurchaseType=0and tell her to stop being such a drama queen. How tiresome!
Back to top
birdsRbad



Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 6:45 am    Post subject: What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear Reply with quote
I can help as an online, free wedding planner. Email me and we can get started.
Back to top
psstoffagain



Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 12

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 6:50 am    Post subject: What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear Reply with quote
The fact that this woman has put you through this on your day is unacceptable. It sounds like you have jumped through hoops for her and it is time for you to put your foot down. This day isnt about her, its about you and since you have extended the effort to appease her and it looks like there is no pleasing her, I would then ask her if she really wants to do this for you. If she says yes, then tell her there has to be a compromise. It is for one day, you are not asking her to make a lifestyle change. Just one day and let her know that you really want her there, but you cant take much more stress, You have other bigger things to worry about to make your day go smoother..I nice pair of Pallazzo pants with a slightly jewelled top should suffice - and let her wear her flats.
Back to top
cardgirl2



Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 6:56 am    Post subject: What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear Reply with quote
Sorry but for your friendship she should conform to your wedding attire. I don't think she is being a true friend by being so rigid in refusing to wear a dress or gown. I am sorry, if she cannot conform, then tell her that you are not comfortable with her choices in attire and that maybe she should bow out gracefully and you will ask someone else. Her wearing pants and a button down shirt will look absolutely awful and detract and cause wagging tounges and gossip by people at the wedding. I know she has been your best friend, but it is your wedding not hers, and if she cannot wear an outfit that will fit into your scheme of things, then she shouldn't be in the bridal party. You said you respect her for who she is and are afraid to hurt her, but is she being hurtful to you by her stubborness? It is a two way street here. You are way too nice. I don't say you have to be a bridezilla, but it is your special day and it should be perfect in every way. So tell her that you cannot be comfortable with her refusal to wear a gown or dress or palazzo pants and a top, so ask her to bow out. If she is angry at you...was she really your friend? I really wonder. She seems like a spoiled brat to me. If she is bi or gay..that is not the point. For a day, she should conform to what you want and that is it!
Back to top
JM



Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 8

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 7:02 am    Post subject: What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear Reply with quote
If she was truly your friend she would suck it up for one day. You are not asking her to murder anyone, you are asking her to wear a dress. She is a woman and she should resemble one. If she cannot do this for you as a friend she really should not have accepted the position of maid of honor. You are going to have to explain to her that you have been more than flexible and accomodating and she has not. If she can't abide by your wishes after you have been so gracious you need to remove her from the bridal party. Explaining of course that one of the responsibilities of being maid of honor is to dress approprately as such. Not wearing a dress or even something that resembles evening wear is not acceptable and if she cannot fufill the duty she can't be part of the wedding party. This shouldn't affect her beliefs or ideology ( i gather she is a lesbian from your comments) She needs to look presentable at an elegant function. This isn't a ridiculous request. You have gone beyond compromise (compromise is when you meet in the middle - not when you give an inch and she takes a mile) and that is not fair to you. The only other suggestion I could think of involves a skirt and is a military style dress. (pencil skirt & suit jacket) Like the women in the marines or army wear.You know someone posted above that her behavior is not fair to your other bridesmaids. I think they are right. When you are a bridesmaid even if you really don't like the dress you wear it anyway. I'm starting to think that she is trying to steal some attention here. Get a new maid of honor. After the crap this girl pulled your other bridesmaids will understand and someone will step up for you.
Back to top
kittywhite92630



Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 6

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 7:08 am    Post subject: What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear Reply with quote
The wedding is about YOU not your selfish friend! It's the bride's choice and the bride's day. If your friend cannot suck it up for one day then I suggest that you find another MoH because this woman is not a true friend. At one point in our lives we're all going to have had to wear hideous bridesmaid dresses for our friends - that's what friends are for.
Back to top
sami_pickle_68465



Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 11

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 7:13 am    Post subject: What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear Reply with quote
a nice dress suit
Back to top
zetamomma



Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 10

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 7:19 am    Post subject: What can the maid of honor wear? She's not so manly to wear Reply with quote
You know, I'm getting married in Five weeks. I understand that you don't want her to compromise herself, but at the same timeC'MON!! I know guys that would wear a dress (not gay!LOL) if that's what the other bridesmaids are supposed to be wearing. Who she is has nothing to do with the outfit she wears as your maid of honour. If it did, there are a lot of compromised bridesmaids out there!If she's not willing to bend at least a little and help you out, you have to move on.....and don't worry about asking another bridesmaid...I was in that position three days before a friends wedding when her sister wasn't able to make it. I was happy to be next in line!
Back to top
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Wedding Photographers Forum - Forum Index // Wedding Attire All times are GMT - 5 Hours
Goto page Previous  1, 2
Page 2 of 2
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum